Friday, May 9, 2014

The moments that made me a mom....

Those moments of pure exhaustion when sleeping while sitting up and nursing a baby at the same time was completely natural...

The times I felt my heart basically crumble in my chest when another kid was mean to you...

Feeling the tears well up and the grin spread across my face when you would look at me and smile that gummy smile....

How velvety soft your skin was....

The smell of your freshly bathed head that was probably smelled a million times...

Your contagious giggle when we would sing James Brown songs after the ABC's during bath time...

Every wrinkle on the bottom of your feet that I'm absolutely sure I had memorized by touching them so much...

Your favorite songs that I would memorize to keep you happy...

The lightbulb moment when you learned how to write your name...

Special toys you would tuck close to you during naptime...

The rainboots you wore with every outfit to go ANYwhere...

Those two front teeth that came in weeks apart from each other giving you a cartoonish look...

Hearing the word Mama and crying...

Watching you play a sport you love....

Feeling the swell of pride as you stand up for yourself or others...

How small your chubby hands were in mine....

The way you hid behind my legs until about age 5...

Every single, darn class party ever invented...

The first time you got sick...

Putting you on my feet and lifting you up in the air for what felt like hours at a time...

The first diaper blowout...

When you would fall asleep at your highchair during dinner...

Your obsession with rolie polies....

Chubby cheeks that were kissed over and over and over again...

The eyebrows....

Hugs so tight....

Rough nights standing outside your door praying and hoping without hope that you would someday love to sleep through the night...

The eyelashes that swept your cheeks when you were asleep...

Open mouthed toddler kisses....

Potty training madness....

Field trips...

Heart stopping emergencies that I didn't see coming...

Having to make friends with your classmate's parents...

Frog catching.....

Thousands of tea parties with lots of Goldfish and marshmallows...

Your first fish...

Your first dead fish...

Bedtime stories...

Growth spurts...

Teething...

Loving you beyond your temper tantrum...

The first time you stood in front of the ocean...

Your first movie...

Snack plates...

First days of school....

Last days of school, complete with shaving cream...

Shots....

Realizing that the stories of mothers lifting cars off of their children is a completely plausible happening...

Painting your toenails for the first time...

Pigtails...

Braids....

The sigh in your sleep...

The way you dig your feet under my legs when you sneak into my bed...

Freckles sprinkled across sunkissed faces...

Knowing when to walk away before I flipped my lid...

When I didn't walk away....

That first flutter of giant butterflies in my belly...

Feeling helpless when you cried after being fed, changed and rocked forever...

Making your first doctor appointment and referring to you as "my son"...

Walks around the block....

Watching you grow up and knowing you are destined for greatness in such a real way...

Your school programs...

Fighting for you with an intensity I have never felt before...

Wanting you to succeed even if that means a college far away from me...

Because I said so....

Crying at Hallmark commercials and finally getting why mom did...

Loving you enough to let you hate me for awhile...

Showers that were spent playing peek-a-boo around the shower curtain while you were in your bouncy chair...

Naps where I just couldn't bring myself to lay you down...

The nightgowns...

The baby lotion....

Pride in your accomplishments....

Tooth fairy visits...

Christmas Eve...

Guilt....

The telltale sign of a mother--- the feeling I'm just not getting it right...



I couldn't possibly put into words all of the moments that I feel created this mother creature I have become.
My life was not just changed by these three kiddos...my life was transformed.
The gut feelings, the tears that come from nowhere, the feeling of failure, the uncontrollable love and emotion, the mama bear instinct, the need to be completely away from them and then the intense need to be in every room they are in...I'm a mom.

To my three little birds...thank you for giving me the gift of being your mom.
Always remember how much I love you.


Love,
Mom















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